Slutty Spaghetti

21/11 SLUTTY SPAGHETTI

I can't pretend this wasn't a little-big mistake. In the sense that my eyes were bigger than my stomach, and was remedy to a tipsy series of events. I know I am preachy about avoiding tomato-based pastas, I am guilty of contradiction here. There is very little tomato sauce used, and is more of a vegetable ragu which happens to be on top of pasta - tactical answer, avoid the question.

I call it slutty because it takes inspiration from Pasta Puttanesca which translates to tarts spaghetti, and involves few ingredients usually found in the kitchen. This one is more slutty, involving all the ingredients I found and is my remedy to a long best-forgotten weekend. Unabashedly eaten from a big bowl with a glass of wine to match. This pasta is all about anti-shame, for you should never feel guilt for indulging any urge. Take the chance and try to steal a fiery kiss, the next day eat this.

Ingredients (all approximate) - 

300g pasta (dried, this is no fuss)

100ml tomato paste
1 shot Campari/1 glass of wine (I know but trust me)
250g Tuna (in oil)
1 onion
1 garlic clove
1/2 tsp Chilli flakes
1 Tomato
Shreds of cabbage
grated stem of a Cauliflower
Parmesan
Parsley

What I did - Two Pots. One Glass of wine.

Don't over think this at all. Put the pasta into a pot filled with water, salted like the mediterranean sea,  and boil. While its cooking, say 10 minutes, prepare the sauce.

Finely dice and fry the onion and garlic, until browned to remove the acrid burn. Add the chilli flakes and then add the alcohol. Now the Campari i used is only in a small amount and adds sweetness but also a strong bitter hit, which counters the salt of the sauce and pasta - take it as you will or use wine if your eyebrow is raised.

Add the grated cauliflower stem to the sauce and stir in, adding some body to the sauce base. Then fry in the cabbage and chopped tomato. Check the pasta at this point, it should be ready to strain. Return to the pot with a slick of olive oil. Back to the sauce, add the tomato paste and then the can of tuna - avoid the cardboard tuna in brine at all costs. Don't stir too much or the tuna will break up, instead let it heat through then you're ready to be filled.

Put the pasta into an extra-large bowl. Cover with the chunky sauce, this isn't an elegant meal and should be eaten guiltily and solo. Scatter parmesan and parsley and take your glass of wine to the sofa. There's no need to look around you or stand on ceremony, just fork all the golden noodles up from the depths of the bowl, collecting the sauce on their way to the impending doom of your waiting mouth.

Use the wine to help yourself through, originally drunk as a digestive in the middle ages so appropriated here. No matter what your problems are, they will all slowly be replaced with pasta fullness. Food is life, life is theatre - never let the curtain close.

JG